Lying

Teaching Children not to lie

"I would never lie to my children." How often have you heard this? Children copy our actions more than they follow our words.

Children learn by your actions more than your words. This is important because sometimes we're not aware of our actions.

Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny don't exist so saying they do is a lie. You can have the experience of them without lying, I told my kids the story of St Nicholas but they knew I put their gifts in stockings (and why would I want an imaginary being getting credit for my hard work). Easter Hunts are still fun for kids knowing mum, dad or grandpa hid the eggs.

Instead of the tooth fairy still give your kids money, although don't do what I did. When Sarah was five a friend told her about the tooth fairy and she was so excited, Sarah has loved money from the beginning, her first word was money so getting money for old teeth was a great idea for her. We had a conversation where I explained to her the tooth fairy wasn't real but in our house I would give them 50 cents for the small teeth and $1 for the molars. Anyway, a couple of years later when she lost her first tooth I handed her $1 without thinking, she jumped up and down and said that means $2 for molars which is what I continued to pay.

By the way my children knew not to tell others Santa etc weren't real, I told them when the children's parents were ready they would tell them. What my children did learn was I would not lie to them, even if it was a socially acceptable lie.

Footnote: Sarah's first word was money. When she was one we were at my dad's shop cashing up and I sat her beside the till. When I opened the drawer she pointed at the money with eyes open wide and said moooneeey and then took a deep breath and sighed with a big grin on her face.